2013

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I'm gonna remember 2013 as one of the toughest years of my life. I had to face and fight different challenges over the 4 quarters:

1st quarter: Difficult pregnancy

2nd quarter: Baby was in NICU for a month and learning how to become a mom

3rd quarter: Learning about the accidental pregnancy (too soon!)

4th quarter: Fighting a monster causing marital issues

All those challenges gave me a lesson to learn.

1. Apology. An apology has 3 parts. I'm sorry, It was my fault and how do I make it right? It has to come with sincerity. If an apology is forced, it will not have any value. Because the person apologizing ddoes not realize his mistakes.

2. I know from the beginning I have monster-in-laws disguising as religious folks (aha! those who shout about religion as the scariest people.) When they are mean to you, should you remain respectful? For what? Those who stand in the middle are cowards. They know what is right. I'd forgive them if they decide to go the opposite side with valid reasons than remain in the middle.

3. Trials will show you who your real friends are.

4. Love. If only you said, "I love you and I'm sorry" at the beginning. A hug would be nice too. Maybe. Just maybe. Everything would have been different.

This 2014 my Mantra is : Let it go.

Let it go, Let it go

Can't hold it back anymore

Let it go, Let it go

Turn my back and slam the door

The snow glows white on the mountain tonight

Not a footprint to be seen

A kingdom of isolation and it looks like I'm the queen

The wind is howling like this swirling storm inside

Couldn't keep it in

Heaven knows I tried

Don't let them in, don't let them see

Be the good girl you always had to be

Conceal, don't feel, don't let them know

Well now they know

Let it go, let it go

Can't hold it back anymore

Let it go, let it go

Turn my back and slam the door

And here I stand

And here I'll stay

Let it go, let it go

The cold never bothered me anyway

It's funny how some distance makes everything seem small

And the fears that once controlled me can't get to me at all

Up here in the cold thin air I finally can breathe

I know I left a life behind but I'm too relieved to grieve

Let it go, Let it go

Can't hold it back anymore

Let it go, Let it go,

Turn my back and slam the door

And here I stand

And here

I'll stay

Let it go, let it go

The cold never bothered me anyway

Standing - frozen in the life I've chosen

You won't find me, the past is so behind me

Buried in the snow

Let it go, let it go

Can't hold it back anymore

Let it go, let it go,

Turn my back and slam the door

And here I stand

And here I'll stay

Let it go, let it go

The cold never bothered me anyway...

(let the music go on)

And here I'll stay

Let it go, let it go

Oooooh let it go